OK, deep breaths, Dawn…deep breaths. It’s all over now. You never even have to look at this game again. Keep calm. Pick up something fun. Forget this ever happened. In fact, don’t even write an entry for this. Off you go.

…but if I didn’t write an entry, I wouldn’t get the chance to tell my non-existent audience how fucking terrible this is. Which is something I NEED to do, because I probably have an unwritten, unspoken duty to warn people away from this game.

I used to hate Dragon Quest. I started off with IX on the DS when it was released, and I was so excited – I’d heard so much about this series. Growing up without a PS2 I didn’t have the chance to play VIII, and this was to be my first foray. It was something of a disaster. I didn’t care for the art style, I didn’t like how aimless it was, and the music…my god, the music. It was like Pokemon Ruby all over again.

But after watching Dragonball and getting used to Toriyama’s art style, and playing my through Dragon Quest IV, and then V, then XI on the Switch last year, I’ve definitely re-appraised my stance on the series. Tastes change, I guess!